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IRRESPONSIBLE

Seriously, this world is kinda fucked up. Yes hell yeah it is.

I lost my laptop but "THE UNAMED ONES" think they are on the side of justice.

Kindness is not repaid. My kindness was for nothing.

Friendship was tested, and money proved to be more powerful than friendship.

The people that I thought were responsible were the most irresponsible.

I only knew of my huge lost after 5 weeks. After 9 weeks, there is still no news of concrete compensation.

I'm the one suffering the loss of my dear companion, whereas the people who lost it live like it never happened.

My laptop was not only my companion. It had the photos of all my dear ones. All the photos of me and Pamela growing up FIVE YEARS together are gone. The photos of me and my friends are all gone too.

Can you imagine? All your precious memories all gone like that... I'm really sad about it. I can never retrieve it.

All my programs inside are all gone. All those programs, memories, projects and games are all gone. Some of my projects that I did consists of websites that could be used professionally. All the applications I downloaded are all gone. There were lots of sensitive information inside and there are all at risk now. Even Jov's game was inside and it was gone. I felt so bad that I apologized to him immediately. But him being my true friend didn't blame me. But UNNAMED on the other hand was not spotted apologizing to him. Another thing I cannot figure out why.

Guess what? They say they wanna give me a second hand laptop. And worse. My dear "friend" did not even say a word. Only one sorry. And worse. Only one sorry. Then that's it. And for your info: My laptop is worth more than $2K plus in the market. And those idiots wanna pay me less than $2K.

Dad was right. They will try to squeeze their way out of this. The people of the world are like that.

I will give them one more week. If I don't get what I want, I will sue them.

It's not about money anymore. It's about principles.

It's the way of life.

You borrow apple from people, you lose it, you give back apple. You do not give back half an apple.

I hope my dear "friend" realizes that fact after 19 years of life.

If you no money to buy apple, then go pluck one or grow one.

And I seriously didn't want to post this. But I'm so fucked up that I have to rant about it. I everyday get scolded by my pops cos of you. I'm also fucked up

Cos all I get from UNNAMED'S MOTHER is:

"I don't know anything."

"Your parents very rude leh"

"I only can compensate you second hand one. Or else I don't compensate lor. Then I wait for your lawyer letter"

"You all give me a price. If reasonable then I pay"

-The Killer Line- "Who ask you lend the laptop to my daughter?" - When I hear this I was very very pissed. It's like a robber telling the cops that it's the jewellery's store fault for setting up a store here or else he wouldn't have stole. Not that I saying UNNAMED stole my laptop, but it's just an analogy. But there might be a possibility.

Hmm... I'm not gonna comment on their actions. But if this is truely justice, then perhaps the readers of the blog should voice out.

Sorry man, I feel this way and I will say it. I for once don't remain silent when things happen, unlike you.

You do realize that if you do something irresponsible, you will be marked with the bane of irresponsibility. Every single person you pass will look at you in that way. Even if they don't, in their hearts they secretly harbour that thought.

I didn't cause this. You cause it your self. I'm so angry with you. And it's not only about money.

Apologies now don't really mean a thing. Cos I don't sense the sincerity at all. If you truely treasure our friendship, you would have followed up with me and apologize. You would have come out with plans and stuff. Instead I must be the one to chase you for compensation. I don't think you treat me as a friend anymore. Because of money, you are willing to abandon our friendship and engage in a cat and mouse game of avoidance.

I feel betrayed... I know there is a huge possibility I may never get back my laptop or compensation. I will never believe in such irresponsible people again. I don't want to blow things up. But I don't sense any sincerity from you at all. None at all.

And please keep to your promise to meet up. Don't last minute cancel appointment. I don't want and don't like to drag this on anymore.

FUCK IT LA! SO KIND FOR WHAT!?

Seriously fuck it.

Fuck it all.

I'm fucking pissed now.

I'm fucking pissed at how shameless some people can be.

Really. Some people can be just this shameless.

I always believed that responsibility is a virtue that most people have. But I was wrong.

Apparently, some people can be just such cowards, afraid to face the music. Maybe the ignorant and young would behave this way. If it's only that it is understandable. But don't fucking fuck with me and start fucking negotiating. Please. Really. You are fucking in the wrong and don't try to negotiate and point fingers at me.

I think all that education is going to waste. Running away for so long and so afraid to face me. You know why is that? Cos deep down inside, you know you are wrong.

And by the way, you cause me so much problems each day. I fucking have to do my animation project and have absolutely no time to handle such stuff. And yet I get fucked at home everyday because of this. My parents nag and scold me all day cos of this. You have absolutely no idea, hiding behind that shell of yours.

I used to think you were the most responsible of my friends. But apparently, I was damn wrong. I never rant on my blog before, but hell yeah I'm gonna fucking rant today cos I can't take it anymore.

I shall not mention your name but you bloody hell know who you are. You are the one that is in the wrong and you are the one that should handle it. Don't be a coward. You will only let me despise you even more.

I don't know if I can ever be friends with you or see you in the same light again. Don't disappoint me or yourself further. Seriously. Just give me what belongs to me and then you can run or do whatever you want. You need not even be bothered by me anymore after that.

If you don't want anybody else to handle this then come find me personally. Yes granted the stuff belongs to me. But you are the one responsible now. So come look for me. I don't like playing cat and mouse games with people. Its cos you fucking take this long to handle this and show such irresponsible behavior that other people have to step into this. You think I like people calling on my behalf and scolding my "friend"? No I don't.

Oh wait. A "friend" wouldn't run away from responsibilty and run away and leave me in this shit right?

And to think that I actually gave you 8 weeks of time to actually think about it and face me. And you never even took the opportunity to. All you did was pretend nothing happened and live on.

I should have listened to JW. I was actually using it that day. He told me not to lend it. I said its ok. It's my trusted friend. Its really ok.

Apparently I was so hell wrong. At least I realized now. A little too late though.

You did something wrong. Apologizing won't help. I just want what is mine back.

Don't wait, cos by next week my project is over and I have all the time in the world. If you need someone to remind you to return what's not yours, then fine I shall prosecute you everyday till you do so.

Responsible is definitely not the adjective associated with you now. And another thing.

Please reflect on your own behavior and how you handled the whole matter. Honestly, I have no grounds to believe anything you say now. Gimme back what's mine.

I don't give a shit whether you can give it back or not. A thief who stole a something gets punished regardless whether he has a good financial status. An eye for an eye, you lose an apple, you pay an apple back. Don't fucking give me back half an apple.

I have been too kind. Unfortunately, you desecrated it. I shall not be lenient anymore.

By the way, if you are wondering why so many people know about this. I only told two of my friends. But somehow everyone knew. Hmm... But by right... If you think your behavior is correct and righteous, then by all means, you have no need to fear about people knowing about this. But I'm not the kind to brag about people's misdeeds.

PLEASE DO THE RIGHT THING!

RETURN WHAT'S RIGHTFUL TO ME!

(I can't believe I even used the word "Please")

The Man In The Mirror

I always wanted to do great things. I always wanted to change the world.

I always move forward to a Destiny that shapes the future. I wanted the world to be a better place.

I tried to change and did everything. But after I achieved it, I knew I was wrong.

The only way to change the world is to change myself. If I wanted to change others, I have to start with myself. I was doing fine all along, until I decided others should change to fit the system.

Yes the world is not perfect, but still, I was a good man.

I had everything. Not riches, not fame but I had a love so true.

But all my actions have done nothing but to taint it and ruin it.

I became selfish, not understanding, I became everything I sought out to destroy in others in the first place.

Before I ruin myself and my love further, before I lose every aspect of my soul, I must stop.

I must look back and find myself again. It is so difficult because I have forgotten. But it is locked deep within the abyss of my memories and my heart. I will unlock them and feel them again.

To change the world, I have to change myself. I have to learn the way of giving in, the way of unreciprocation. I want to relearn how to do things without getting anything in return. I want myself back.

Being popular, rich or whatsoever is not important. Though I have all of that now, I am not happy. What's important is I retain myself, the Man In The Mirror.

I will achieve it. Being the good man, being the one for you. For this is what I promised you.